Lessons Learned From Every 5 Years Of Life
- Stephanie
- Jul 14, 2020
- 3 min read
I wasn't quite sure how to title this post but here we go!
A few days before I turned 25 last month, I came up with the idea of jotting down a few lessons I've learned from every 5 years of my life. These are things I wish I could've told myself back then but am grateful to know now.
I'm a firm believer that there are no losses in life, only lessons we learn in order to adjust, grow, and continue on.
Ages 0-5
Watching movies like Selena and Disney sing-a-long's, learning the different harmonies and melodies in Britney songs, and singing on the countertop at family gatherings is something you'll always enjoy. This is all foreshadowing.
Ages 6-10
Getting lost in listening to your CD player and not realizing how loud you're singing is a feeling you will cherish someday and spend your time trying to find again.
You and your siblings will probably fight every now and then for the rest of your lives but you'll come to understand each other more as you get older.
That teacher was right- there will always be someone around that you don't get along with. Learn to accept it but know that as you get older, you don't have to put up with it.
You won't always wish you were white. As a woman of color, you will cherish your skin color, heritage, and history. You will not always feel un-beautiful because you are not white.
Ages 11-15
That girl who bullies you horribly is going to join a church and completely 180, marry someone from our hometown, never work a day in her life, and pop out two kids with the weirdest names possible. She will follow you on Instagram, like all of your photos, and will never have the guts to live the life you have.
(I know, I know, GRL PWR but she used to terrorize me so 25 year-old Steph is laughing now).
Things won't always be this awkward!
Despite what your church leaders say, liking guys and chicks is okay. Tons of the other teens at youth group will come out as non-binary, gay, trans, etc. in like 7 years. You're not alone in thinking that the dude preaching anti-LGBTQ+ rhetoric is an idiot.
Stop trying to seem older and more mature. You're still a kid.
Smoking a cigarette does not make you seem cool. You're being an idiot.
Ages 16-20
Questioning religion is so totally okay. Being shut down and embarrassed by youth group leaders for asking questions is lame but you won't really identify with religion much more after you're 17 anyways.
You won't always want to die. You won't always feel numb and stuck. You will find healthy ways to cope and grow. Self-harm and suicide attempts will become a distant memory.
The music you listen to now is the music you will listen to forever.
Older men sexualizing you is not okay.
You do not have to apologize for being a female. You don't have to make yourself smaller for other people. You do not have to quiet down.
Your work ethic now will inspire you later. All of the volunteering and interning will absolutely pay off. You're a go-getter.
Ages 21-25
You never have to try to make someone look bad. They will do it on their own eventually.
Just because your 20's are supposed to be your 'selfish years' doesn't mean you should hurt anyone on your path. Be mindful and kind.
Making friends is easy, keeping them is harder.
Someone else's opinion of you is none of your business.
After two natural disasters destroying your homes and belongings (flood when I was like 12, fire when I was 21), you'll realize that things are replaceable and life really does go on. Perseverance is always key.
You've got to learn the difference between anxiety and intuition because sometimes it's not as easy as just following your gut instinct.
Say what you feel. Be direct with people about how they make you feel.
Do absolutely whatever you want to do but more importantly, don't do things you don't want to do.
Never be afraid to stand up for what you believe in.
Say, "no," whenever you want to. It's a full sentence.
In the next five years, I'm sure I'll learn plenty more. Maybe even enough to revise what I've learned so far. I genuinely have felt myself grow more and more everyday for years now and I think it's important to remember the realizations that got me to this point. Though many lessons weren't easy, they've all been individually valuable.
I encourage you, whoever's reading this, to jot down things that have inspired or taught you.
From a wise but always learning 25 year old me to you,
Peace out, girl scout.
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